For Your Health

I've wanted to do a post on Steve Brule, MD, from T&E Awesome Show for a while now, for the severe benefit of anyone who wasn't familiar, and was finally prompted by this latest sketch:

These older ones are spot on as well:

b t dubs, just read that John C had to turn down the role of Champ Kind to be in The Aviator...how I spurn the course of history at this moment. can you imagine how much better one of the greatest comedies of our time could have been? not just losing the regrettable and forgettable performance of David Koechner (whose name I just had to look up, because he's not that tight), but gaining a veritable beacon of comedy in his place? to the delorion, we have a howard hughes project to derail...

Posted by Ultramafic on Friday, September 5, 2008 at 9:10 PM 0 comments

Bernie Mac: Pour Some Out

A dark day for comedy yesterday - Bernie Mac died at the age of 50 from complications related to pneumonia. Here are some exceptional moments from "Kings of Comedy":







Vintage goodness (dig those threads):



Stir it like coffee:

Posted by Ultramafic on Sunday, August 10, 2008 at 8:31 AM 1 comments

The Fuzz

(via Vice) Since Serpico it’s become virtually impossible to spot undercover cops. They could be anywhere.


.

Posted by Pan Tostado on Thursday, July 10, 2008 at 10:02 AM 0 comments

Platitudinous

I'm not here to make friends:




another perspective

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Posted by Pan Tostado on Tuesday, July 8, 2008 at 10:18 AM 0 comments

In plain English this time

When she isn't postin' up in front of cammy cams, Elise Sewell can be found postin' erudite non-sequitors on her live journal:

I propose to elevate the status of "conversate" from a Biggie-perpetrated malaprop to a legitimate member of the lexicon (though I think it could be argued, ye prescriptivist tightasses, that there is really no such thing as a "Biggie-perpetrated malaprop," only usage and syntax that we did not yet know was correct until he uttered it. I feel the same way about R Kelly; this is why I know for sure that it's "butt-" and not "buck-naked").

Hate to nitpick, but shouldn't that be butt-neckit? Anyway, Elise has set up shop in Hong Kong and in her travels around Asia she's snapped some amusing pictures of her own. Take a peak:

Posted by Pan Tostado on Friday, June 27, 2008 at 11:31 AM 2 comments

B & T

(via Catbird)


10 years ago, we only had 2 kinds of T-shirts to choose from; today we have 3!

The Douchebag Neck T, often accompanied by Kangol cap and pointy pleather shoes, can be found at a Midtown club near you. Do yourself a solid and stay away.

Posted by Pan Tostado on Monday, June 23, 2008 at 1:44 PM 0 comments

Victory

New York Magazine checks in with 30 Rock's Judah Friedlander, whose new act has him unleashing his athletic prowess on all a yalls...

NYM: What sports do you excel at?
Every one. Name one, dude.

Lacrosse.
I don't consider lacrosse a sport. To me that's just a frat activity that got out of hand.

How about downhill skiing?
I do uphill skiing, I don't do downhill skiing. I think that's for nerd amateurs.

Street basketball?
I can dunk with my foot.

Softball?
I play hardball, sorry. I don't need some bloated ball to hit it.

Ice hockey?
Banned internationally.

Why?
I skated too fast, the rink melted, and the team drowned.

Swimming.
I'm banned from swimming. Every time I get in the water all the surrounding chicks jump in. It's really cool, but technically illegal in competition.

Hundred-yard dash?
I just beat a cheetah in the hundred-yard dash, by 70 yards. And I gave him a 50-yard head start.

That must have been demoralizing for the cheetah.
After the race, the cheetah tested positive for steroids. I'm really the best.

Tour de France.
Yes, I've actually won that a few times. I wasn't even in the race. I was just going from point A to point B, and I won it. I was actually coasting for a lot of it.

Are you more of a climber or sprinter?
I can do either one. I can actually coast uphill. I just have really good body control. Good question.

Yoga?
I'm actually banned from the Himalayas, because I'm too good at yoga.

You don't say. I assume it's a similar situation with martial arts?
I am the best martial artist in the world. I have a book coming out about that. I will tell you that I'm an extra-dark black belt.

What about ultimate fighting?
No, I don't consider them real athletes. They do mixed martial arts, that's because they're not good at any one particular martial art and they gotta mix it up. Those guys are all pussies. I've challenged all of them, and they've all backed down.

So basically this is the act?
This is what my act is about, how I'm the greatest athlete in the world.

Judah is performing at the Comedy Cellar in NY on Wednesdays and Thursdays. Get your act together-- pay that man, get some laughs.

.

Posted by Pan Tostado on Tuesday, June 17, 2008 at 1:01 PM 0 comments

one voiceover to rule them all

weirdo amazing video (chewbacca on vocals). make sure your vol is sufficient:

Posted by Pan Tostado on Wednesday, June 4, 2008 at 11:16 AM 0 comments

From Bill's POV

Following up on our initial O'Reilly post, let's take a look at that infamous O'Reilly meltdown-- this time, from Bill's POV.

Seeee, there's a perfectly good explanation for Bill's behavior. He's totally not a slow-loris-clubbing monster-- just not that into Rick Astley ( impossible?).

PS it's the muthufuckin reeeemix.

Posted by Pan Tostado on Wednesday, May 21, 2008 at 8:37 AM 1 comments

I dream of killing your donkey

Some of you have probably seen this. For those who haven't, enjoy. It's one of my favorite open letters. It came to mind after this dinosaur in my office asked me if I had an email address. Fair question ppppppfffft.

----

Dear Louis,

You're a very nice man and I do enjoy working with you. The fact that you own a donkey and a rooster makes me laugh. I don't know many people who own a donkey and a rooster who don't also live on a farm. You're sincere and there is not a whit of vitriol in your body. I don't think I've ever seen you mad. Often you share your lunch with me when you can't finish it.

That's why this is difficult for me.

Every time you come into my office I already know what you're going to tell me. You're going to tell me that you sent me an e-mail. And usually, just about the time you're walking into my office, the boingy sound that I set up to alert me that I have received an e-mail is boinging. Or it boings right while you're standing there. Then we say the same things: You say, "I just wanted to let you know I sent you an e-mail!" I say, "Yup, just got it." And then you say, "Great, thanks! Just wanted to let you know!"

I know you're a bit older and not technically inclined. I know you still use words like "facsimile" and "teleconference." But here's the thing with e-mail. When you send me one, I get it. That's the whole point of it. Really. It's why they invented it. So you can send me stuff electronically, and I can get it.

I want you to know I dream of killing your donkey.

Sincerely,
Jason

Posted by Pan Tostado on Thursday, April 10, 2008 at 3:20 PM 0 comments